Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...

And now for something from the "be careful what you pray for" files...

You may know that the memorial of St. Joseph the Worker was last Sunday. You may also know that I have a special devotion to dear St. Joseph, the sweet patron saint of workers, fathers, and the Universal Church. And you probably also know that my own beloved husband has been job-free since September.

A wee novena for the feast day was certainly in order, don't you think? Yeah, me too. And now, wouldn't you know it, I'm well into the recruiting process for a real-live new job of my own. Oops!

A few weeks ago, Bill came across the perfect career opportunity--for me. Right back in my own field (business/systems integration, ya know), right here in town, for a great company, on a really exciting project, right now. He suggested I send in a resume, so I did, not expecting to hear from them--after all, I've been "retired" for over a decade now. Technologically speaking, I'm a dinosaur.

Maybe not quite. In the past week and a half--beginning right around the time I finished praying the St. Joseph novena--I've had two phone interviews for this position, and have gone through a roller coaster of emotions and opinions about the whole idea of possibly taking a "real" job again.


Here are some thoughts that have been pinging around in my dinosaur brain:

1) Can I still be a good Catholic mom if I'm a business mommy?
2) Would Bill really be happy to stay home with the kids?
3) Will I lose my mind trying to multitask between a really hard full-time career and managing our home at the same time?
4) If I go back to work, will my kids be scarred for life?
5) Is having a working mom better than having to move if Bill gets a job in another town?
6) Does Bill really want this? Is he going to do the laundry and everything?
7) What if I hate it?
8) What if I love it?
9) Should I return that new swimsuit I just bought, since I won't be at the pool with the kids this summer after all?
10) Do you think I could convince them to let me start work in September?

Preparing for the interviews, I've alternated between getting very psyched about this opportunity, which is a very cool one, and feeling completely overwhelmed that I actually am a total technology dinosaur that no one would want to hire. On the other hand, I really am probably a pretty good candidate for this position, and it could be great for all of us.

Finally it occurred to me that if God can part the Red Sea, He can surely get this job for me if that's His plan. And if not, well of course I wouldn't want it anyway. Over the past week I've gone from wanting the job very much and obsessively preparing for the interviews, to feeling certain that what I really want with all my heart is actually to homeschool KLD and JPD again next fall. The good thing about that is that no matter what happens, I'll be happy. It's all good, right?

Stay tuned!

In the meantime I am clinging tightly to the words of St. Paul...

"I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
~ Philippians 4:11-13